What we seek

Mental illness are words people are afraid to speak
When happiness is all we seek

From a place of darkness we rise
Should not come as any surprise

Even when we fumble
Please realize it's just a stumble

Anhedonia is where we're at
Enjoyment is what must begat

Mental illness is not planned
Understanding is all we demand

Future Unknown

With a future unknown
A feeling of imminent doom to dethrone

Where will I be with a future unknown
With thoughts of ensuing gloom

Sadness that seems to loom
What will it say on my tomb

A future of darkness and despair
A present that is beyond repair

Fear of not knowing what will become
A horror that can not be undone

What will the future become

Positive Thoughts

Positive thoughts are what we need
To heal the negative perceptions that we bleed

Happiness is what we desire
Joyous reflection is what we must conspire

Affirmative action we must take
For our mindfulness to awake

Healthy coping skills we must learn
So our emotions don't get burned

Positive thoughts to help our self esteem
Is what we can achieve by working as a team

All we ask is that you try to understand
If you would like to join our merry band

With You

Walking hand in hand
Something I can always stand

Eyes of blue
Always looking true

A smile so bold
It's got me sold

A heart full of love
Fits you like a glove

Trying never to look down
Always turning that frown upside down

One thing must be said
Before any tears are shed

To tell you before we perish
Your the one I cherish

Daughter

To my little girl Brittany
You  will always be my sweetie

Missing you more and more
Life without you is such a bore

From my baby munchkin to
a beautiful young women

May your happiness never darken
and your smile always brighten

Beauty that exists inside and out
Is known by all without a doubt

My love for you will never falter
Even if you stumble I'll just hold tighter

Forever and Always Dad

Life of Uncertainty

A life full of uncertainty
A mind shadowed in confusion
Is this world just a delusion

Feelings of sorrow and despair
Thoughts that don't compare

Emotions of regret and shame
Why do I feel such pain

In my life of uncertainty

A Smile So Genuine

A smile so sure
A beauty so pure

A smile that comes from the heart
A smile I knew from the start

A heart of gold
That has me sold

A soul so deep
It makes me weep

An outlook so true
It makes me blue

A smile so genuine
It's sure not to threaten

A smile so genuine

A Friend Just Met

True friends are hard to find
Your the one I had in mind

Someone that is always there
Even when I'm quite a bear

To a friend just met
I know your a great bet


Thanks Steph

Suicide

 Original version

When the thought of dying seems like your only bet
Just please don't forget
I love you
When you think death is all your going to get
Please don't forget
I love you
If your thinking of jumping from a jet
Please don't forget
I love you
When you think it's your last set
Just please don't forget
I LOVE YOU!!!!

 ReWrite

When the thought of dying seems like your only bet
When you think death is all your going to get
When  your thinking of jumping from a jet
And you don't even fret

When six feet under
Looks like a good plunder
When all you do is blunder
When everyone steals your thunder

When you think it's your last set
When you can only listen to one cassette
When you have to go into debt
To buy a lousy headset

When suicide is sitting ringside
When your sitting poolside
When the feeling won't subside
When the moment comes you have to decide
Is it life or suicide

Manic

Flying high but just getting by
Thoughts occurring faster than I can take action
What will be others reaction

After being down for so long
Maybe this is where I belong

Heart racing out of control
Action that seems so bold
But yet why do I feel so cold

Crumbling Dreams

With my dreams crumbling around me
What does my mind see, nothing but confusion

With my life seeming to have no future
Is it all a delusion

With no hope in sight
What is my conclusion

Would be to end this dreadful flight

Waiting

Waiting for lock down
Will it bring me down

Staying positive through out
Would work without a doubt

Telling myself the game is not over
Will show I'm not a pushover

Wandering where I'll be
Is something I'll have to see

Knowing if the future will bring positive change
Is something I'll have to arrange

Panic

Panic that runs my life
Fear that lives your life

Why can"t I just take flight
To get my head right

Once in the air
Would it be enough to bear

High in the sky wanting to fall
With nobody to call

People that understand
Would make my life grand

Looking Forward

As fall turns to winter the sadness sets in
Stuck in a valley of gloom
With an awful feeling of doom

A road that leads to nowhere
Brings on quite a scare
Not allowing me to leave even on a dare

Looking forward to what spring may bring
Even thinking that happiness is a sin

Delusion

As life is speeding by with not enough
time to do things that should be done
With to much time to think about
things that should not be thought
A mind full of confusion
In a life that seems to be a delusion

Negative Thinking

Negative thinking is like planting a bag of unmarked seeds
You don't know what you have till is to late

Depression

A mind clouded in darkness
A mind full of hopelessness

A mind full of despair
A mind that is beyond repair

A mind full of negative thinking
Is like a ship that is sinking

Positive thoughts are what I seek
For an outlook that seems so bleak

A path well traveled

A path has been well traveled
from a mind that's unraveled

On this path of pain
With nothing to gain

I've walked this path of self destruction
Not having any mental function

Walking without a friend
With no light at the end
I walk this path again

My heart yearns

As my world crumbles around me
The sadness stings like a bee

As my mind fails to keep me strong
As my life seems to be gone

The loneliness grows tall
The tears continue to fall

As my hope disappears
The joy is kept in arrears

As my heart yearns for love again
The sorrow seems to be the trend.

My Daughter

Love of my life
My one and only
So far away yet so near
With the chaos in my head
and the sadness in my heart
Your the one who drives me for a new start

Love

Love is what I seek
with romance at its peak

A friend to hold would
turn my heart to gold

A lover to care for
Like never before

A partner till the end of time
Is what I wish to find

Death of a Friend

For every death of a friend their soul splits
to give you new friends to help you heal

World of Chaos

In my mind there is a world
of chaos and misery in which I live

Thoughts of dying and images of
sorrow is what this world gives

How many pills and prayers will
it take for this world to change

How many tears must be shed
before I am dead.

A Friend Lost

Sadness that returns again and again
When will the sadness end

From feelings of loneliness and pain
To thoughts of regret and shame

Will I ever be the same
From love that's been tossed

To a friend that was lost
Hopes of finding friends till the end

And dreams of finding love again
When will this sadness end

Terror in the Night

Terror in the night
Please help me fight
This terror in the night

Images that should never be seen
and thoughts of not being.
Is the terror I am seeing

Please help me fight
This terror in the night

Hopes and Dreams

Hopes and Dreams
What do they mean
In this world of chaos and hatred
I explode with fear
Running scared thru this world of uncertainty
Where are my Hopes and Dreams I hold so dear

Strength

Strength is what I need
To fight the loneliness in which I fear
Running scared thru a life of things
in which I have no control
My head spinning with thoughts that don't need to be
My life full of confusion and uncertainty
My heart full of sorrow and regret

A Hug A Day

A hug a day to keep the sadness away
A hug a day to keep the loneliness at bay
A hug a day to put a smile on your face
A hug a day to keep the sadness away